withdrawal

Breathe in
breathe out
eventually the pain will disengage
today is another step back
another ten miles
in the wrong direction
what a perilous place to be
so far from fuel
every landmark is unfamiliar
and someone menacing is on my trail

golden one
unflinching in the sun
monster, creator, saviour
what odds brought me here
what fate, what fire
where have you gone
my golden one?

there was fire in the sky today
there was noise
there was billowing smoke
ghost trains to nowhere
bats out of hell
I saw nothing
but my little world dying
in great detail
spelled out
with an imprimatur of hate
what I am is a prisoner
what I am is waiting

all I want
is the sun and rain
the pleasure and the pain
all I want
is a measure of freedom
all I want is you

golden one
you are my sun
you are my moon and stars
you are my blood
you are my scars
baby girl
you are the beginning
and I fear you will be
the end of me.