some sort of salvation

Sweat drips off me
into the mouth
of the dry, baking ground
it soaks into my shirt
my socks
and everything in between
It is a cruel sun
looking over me
and there is the ever-present knowledge
that I can't compete
What is the point of this?
I stink under the sun
for what?
Some sort of salvation?
If it could be found
then why couldn't I find it before?
I can't maneuver
around the questions anymore
I can't fight
the good fight anymore
but not trying is out of the question
I have to fill in the blanks
or something nameless,
something insidious takes over
If you see me
trying but failing
you have to know
this is not the end
I am broken
but not forever
I am wounded
but I'm on the mend
I will fill the thirst beneath me
I will run until
my pain subsides

There are those
who will rise to strangle me
I will rise above
they will be here tomorrow
to try again
Wait for me
meet me beyond this dying ground
There, at the end of the street
do you see me
under those sodium lights?
You can catch me if you try
but not today, not tomorrow
Wait until the rain comes down
breathe me in
feel me soaking into your pores
Remember me
and the cacophony that I was--
such naked hate, naked heat, naked noise
It's no wonder I ran
so far away
Here, I am still waiting
for the final word
the thunderclap to end it all
You and I
are forever fused
under these lights
blisters filling our shoes with blood
hating and breathing hate
and always headed toward
some distant finish line.