shades of man and monster

Not long ago
I held you
and it felt like a miracle
so natural
so real
so undeniable
Not long ago
we rioted in syncopation
we stretched beyond this place
nothing could tame us
nothing could alter us
nothing could break us
But in this hour
my joy has turned to mourning
my laughter into lamentation
We have left that sacred place
to embrace the stillborn,
the questions that plague us
the thoughts that never lay down
the ideas that never sleep
I don't want to leave you
in their jealous grasp
but my desire is the suspect device
This fill-in-the-blank war
has left me here,
staring at a frozen street
wanting only to snare you again
and whitewash the graffiti
that has colored me
these shades of man and monster.